HomeFactopediaBrainoffsRankingsCommunityLog In
You know 0 facts


The Simpsons - Opening Chalkboard Gags

Your overall rating on The Simpsons - Opening Chalkboard Gags =
0%
Your best rally score on The Simpsons - Opening Chalkboard Gags = 0 facts

Play Fact Master on The Simpsons - Opening Chalkboard Gags    

Challenge Friends to a Brainoff on The Simpsons - Opening Chalkboard Gags    

Play a Rally Game on The Simpsons - Opening Chalkboard Gags    



The Simpsons - Opening Chalkboard Gags...
is specific to the chalkboard inscription consistent to almost every opening credit sequence relative to the TV show, The Simpsons.

Source: The Simpsons Archive Website

239 facts:

"Alone Again, Natura-Diddly"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"My Suspension Was Not 'mutual'"
"And Maggie Makes Three"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"'Bagman' is Not a Legitimate Career Choice"
"Another Simpsons Clip Show"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Use Abbrev."
"Apocalypse Cow"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"A Person's a Person No Matter How Ralph"
A reference to "A person's a person, no matter how small" from Horton Hears a Who!
"Bart the Daredevil"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Drive the Principal's Car"
"Bart the Genius"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Waste Chalk"
"Bart Gets an Elephant"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Organ Transplants Are Best Left to the Professionals"
"Bart Gets Famous"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"My Homework Was Not Stolen by a One-armed Man"
A reference to "The Fugitive"
"Bart Gets an F"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Encourage Others to Fly"
"Bart Gets Hit by a Car"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Sell School Property"
"Barting Over"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not"
Bart then chops up the blackboard with an axe
"Bart the Murderer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"High Explosives and School Don't Mix"
"Bart of Darkness"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Beans Are Neither Fruit nor Musical"
"The Bart of War"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Sandwiches Should Not Contain Sand"
"Bart's Comet"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Cursive Writing Does Not Mean What I Think It Does"
"Bart Sells His Soul"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not a Lean Mean Spitting Machine"
"Bart's Friend Falls in Love"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Snap Bras"
"Bart's Girlfriend"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Send Lard Through the Mail"
"Bart Star"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Did Not Invent Irish Dancing"
"Bart to the Future"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"'Non-Flammable' is Not a Challenge"
"Bart Vs. Australia"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Hang Donuts on My Person"
"Bart Vs. Lisa Vs. 3rd Grade"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Fish Do Not Like Coffee"
"Bart Vs. Thanksgiving"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Do That Thing With My Tongue"
"The Bart Wants What It Wants"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Giving Tree is Not a Chump"
"Behind the Laughter"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Obey the Voices in My Head"
"Beyond Blunderdome"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Fridays Are Not 'pants Optional'"
"Black Widower"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Funny Noises Are Not Funny"
"Blood Feud"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Sleep Through My Education"
"The Blunder Years"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not Charlie Brown on Acid"
"The Bonfire of the Manatees"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Does Any Kid Still Do This Anymore?"
"The Boy Who Knew Too Much"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"There Are Plenty of Businesses Like Show Business"
"Brother, Can You Spare Two Dimes?"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Fake Seizures"
"Brother from the Same Planet"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Principal's Toupee is Not a Frisbee"
"Brother's Little Helper"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Pork is Not a Verb"
"Brush With Greatness"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Hide Behind the Fifth Amendment"
"Burns' Heir"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Pledge of Allegiance Does Not End With 'Hail Satan'"
"Burns Verkaufen Der Kraftwerk"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Christmas Pageant Does Not Stink"
"Bye Bye Nerdie"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Scare the Vice President"
A reference to USA Vice-President Dick Cheney being in the hospital with a heart condition
"Call of the Simpsons"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Draw Naked Ladies in Class"
"The Canine Mutiny"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"A Fire Drill Does Not Demand a Fire"
"Cape Feare"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Cafeteria Deep Fryer is Not a Toy"
"The Cartridge Family"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Everyone is Tired of That Richard Gere Story"
"Children of a Lesser Clod"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Today is Not Mothra's Day"
Originally aired on Mother's Day (May 13), 2001
"Colonel Homer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Conduct My Own Fire Drills"
"The Computer Wore Menace Shoes"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Only Provide a Urine Sample when Asked"
"The Crepes of Wrath"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Garlic Gum is Not Funny"
"Crook and Ladder"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Look up What Teacher Makes"
"Dancin' Homer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Trade Pants With Others"
"Day of the Jackanapes"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Hamster Did Not Have 'a Full Life'"
"Days of Wine and D'oh'ses"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Was Not Touched 'there' by an Angel"
"Dead Putting Society"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not a 32 Year Old Woman"
To put it another way, Nancy Cartwright is not a 10-year-old boy
"The Debarted"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Art Teacher is Fat, Not Pregnant"
"Dog of Death"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Saw Nothing Unusual in the Teacher's Lounge"
"D'oh-in' in the Wind"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"No One Cares What My Definition of 'is' Is"
Which is not quite true in President Clinton's case
"Duffless"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Goldfish Don't Bounce"
"Dumbbell Indemnity"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Silly String is Not a Nasal Spray"
"E-I-E-I-(ANNOYED GRUNT)"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Did Not Win the Nobel Fart Prize"
"E. Pluribus Wiggum"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Teacher Did Not Pay Too Much for Her Condo"
"Eternal Moonshine of the Simpson Mind"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Capital of Montana is Not "Hannah""
"Faith Off"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Stop Phoning It In"
"Fear of Flying"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Ralph Won't 'morph' if You Squeeze Him Hard Enough"
"Flaming Moe's"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Underwear Should Be Worn on the Inside"
"The Front"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Sell Miracle Cures"
"G.I. D'oh"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"We Are Not All Naked Under Our Clothes"
"The Great Money Caper"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Nurse is Not Dealing"
"Grift of the Magi"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Sell My Kidney on EBay"
Unlike most, if not all, of Bart's other blackboard quotes, this one was not all caps (the "e" in "eBay" was small); also, Lisa writes "I will not do math in class" during the show
"Guess Who's Coming to Criticize Dinner?"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not the Last Don"
"Half-Decent Proposal"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Bite the Hand That Feeds Me Butterfingers"
Probably a response to a gag in DABF03 when Butterfingers (which featured commercials with the Simpsons in them at one time) were thrown into a fire but wouldn't burn, and the response was "Even the fire doesn't want them"
"Hello Gutter, Hello Fadder"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Won't Not Use No Double Negatives"
"He Loves to Fly and He D'ohs"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Wait 20 Years to Make Another Movie"
"Helter Shelter"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Milhouse Did Not Test Cootie Positive"
"Home Away From Homer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"A Booger is Not a Bookmark"
"Homer Alone"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Spank Others"
"Homer and Apu"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Go Near the Kindergarten Turtle"
"Homer and Marge Turn a Couple Play"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Have a Great Summer, Everyone"
"Homer at the Bat"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Aim for the Head"
"Homerazzi"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Global Warming Did Not Eat My Homework"
"Homer Badman"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Whittle Hall Passes out of Soap"
"Homer Defined"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Squeak Chalk"
Bart squeaks the chalk while writing this
"Homer the Great"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Adding 'just Kidding' Doesn't Make It Okay to Insult the Principal"
"Homer the Heretic"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Defame New Orleans"
New Orleans complained about the opening song in "Oh, Streetcar!"
"Homer Loves Flanders"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not Delightfully Saucy"
"Homer the Moe"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"A Burp in a Jar is Not a Science Project"
"The Homer of Seville"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Wall Street Journal is Better Than Ever"
Fox owner Rupert Murdoch had just purchased the Wall Street Journal
"Homer's Barbershop Quartet"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Never Win an Emmy"
This was the first episode after 1992-93 Emmy nominations were announced, the first time the show was eligible for "Best Comedy Series", but it wasn't nominated (the show had won "Best Animated Show" Emmys in the past)
"Homer Simpson In: "Kidney Trouble""
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not a Licensed Hairstylist"
"Homer Simpson, This is Your Wife"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Laminate Dog Doo"
"Homer's Night Out"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Call My Teacher "Hot Cakes""
"Homer's Odyssey"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Skateboard in the Halls"
"Homer's Paternity Coot"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not Smarter Than the President"
"Homer's Triple Bypass"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Coffee is Not for Kids"
Each line becomes less and less legible; the last line is a scrawl
"The Homer They Fall"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not My Long-lost Twin"
"Homer to the Max"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"No One Wants to Hear About My Sciatica"
"Homer the Vigilante"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not Authorized to Fire Substitute Teachers"
"Homer Vs. Dignity"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Was Not the Sixth Beatle"
"Homer Vs. Lisa and the 8th Commandment"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Make Flatuent Noises in Class"
"Homer Vs. Patty and Selma"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Remember to Take My Medication"
"Home Sweet Homediddly-Dum-Doodily"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"No One Wants to Hear from My Armpits"
"Homie the Clown"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Next Time It Could Be Me on the Scaffolding"
"HOMR"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Network TV is Not Dead"
"Hungry, Hungry Homer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"'Temptation Island' Was Not a Sleazy Piece of Crap"
A reference to a Fox television series where couples were sent to an island filled with singles to test their commitment
"A Hunka Hunka Burns in Love"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Fun Does Not Have a Size"
"Husbands and Knives"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Pilgrims Were Not Illegal Aliens"
"I Don't Wanna Know Why the Caged Bird Sings"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not an FDIC-insured Bank"
"I Love Lisa"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Call the Principal "spud Head""
"I Married Marge"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Torment the Emotionally Frail"
"I'm Goin' to Praiseland"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Genetics is Not an Excuse"
"I'm With Cupid"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Hillbillies Are People Too"
"Insane Clown Poppy"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Surprise the Incontinent"
"Itchy & Scratchy Land"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not the Reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr."
"Itchy & Scratchy & Marge"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Pledge Allegiance to Bart"
"Itchy & Scratchy: The Movie"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Bury the New Kid"
During the episode, Marge writes "I will try to raise a better child"
"It's A Mad, Mad, Mad, Mad Marge"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Cannot Hire a Substitute Student"
"The Joy of Sect"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Shooting Paintballs is Not an Art Form"
"Kamp Krusty"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"This Punishment is Not Boring and Pointless"
"Kill the Alligator and Run"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not Here on a Fartball Scholarship"
"Kill Gil, Volumes 1 & 2"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Frankincense is Not a Monster"
"King-Size Homer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Indian Burns Are Not Our Cultural Heritage"
"Krusty Gets Busted"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"They Are Laughing at Me, Not With Me"
"Krusty Gets Kancelled"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Charge Admission to the Bathroom"
"Lady Bouvier's Lover"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Re-transmit Without the Express Permission of Major League Baseball"
"The Lastest Gun in the West"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Making Milhouse Cry is Not a Science Project"
"Last Exit to Springfield"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Mud is Not One of the 4 Food Groups"
"Last Tap Dance in Springfield"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Dance on Anyone's Grave"
"The Last Temptation of Homer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"All Work and No Play Makes Bart a Dull Boy"
This is probably a reference to The Shining, especially as this quote was not written "line by line" like the others
"The Last Temptation of Krust"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Pain is Not the Cleanser"
"Lemon of Troy"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The First Amendment Does Not Cover Burping"
"Like Father, Like Clown"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Finish What I Sta"
This appears on one line; the rest is blank
"Lisa's First Word"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Teacher is Not a Leper"
"Lisa's Pony"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"'Bart Bucks' Are Not Legal Tender"
"Lisa's Sax"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I No Longer Want My MTV"
"Lisa's Wedding"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Strut Around Like I Own the Place"
"Lisa the Beauty Queen"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Prescribe Medication"
"Lisa Gets an 'A'"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Scream for Ice Cream"
"Lisa on Ice"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Dissect Things Unless Instructed"
"Lisa the Skeptic"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Tease Fatty"
"Lisa the Tree Hugger"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not the Acting President"
A reference to the 2000 USA Presidential election, whose winner had still not been determined when this episode first aired
"Lisa the Vegetarian"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Boys Room is Not a Water Park"
"Little Big Mom"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Create Art from Dung"
A reference to an art exhibit in New York City that included a portrait of the Virgin Mary splattered with dung
"Little Orphan Millie"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"There is No Such Thing As an IPoddy"
"Lost Our Lisa"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not the New Dalai Lama"
"The Mansion Family"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Class Clown is Not a Paid Position"
"Marge Be Not Proud"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Stop Talking About the Twelve Inch Pianist"
"Marge Gets a Job"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Teach Others to Fly"
"Marge in Chains"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Do Not Have Diplomatic Immunity"
"Marge Simpson In: 'Screaming Yellow Honkers'"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Grammar is Not a Time of Waste"
"Marge Vs. the Monorail"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Eat Things for Money"
"Maximum Homerdrive"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"It Does Not Suck to Be You"
"Mayored to the Mob"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
""The President Did It" is Not an Excuse"
This was first shown the day after President Clinton became the first elected President to be impeached (Andrew Johnson, the only other President to be impeached, became President because he was Vice-President when Lincoln was killed)
"Million Dollar Abie"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Flip the Classroom Upside Down"
The classroom was flipped upside-down (well, rotated 180 degrees) while he was writing this
"Miracle on Evergreen Terrace"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Rudolph's Red Nose is Not Alcohol-related"
"Missionary: Impossible"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"A Belch is Not an Oral Report"
"Moaning Lisa"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Instigate Revolution"
"Mom and Pop Art"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"A Trained Ape Could Not Teach Gym"
"The Monkey Suit"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Je Ne Parle Pas Fran├žais"
"Mona Leaves-a"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"This Punishment is Not Medieval."
The lines are written in a medieval style, complete with large first letter - and there is a period at the end of each line
"Monty Can't Buy Me Love"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Have Neither Been There nor Done That"
"Mr. Lisa Goes to Washington"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Spitwads Are Not Free Speech"
"Mr. Plow"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"A Burp is Not an Answer"
"Natural Born Kissers"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Was Not the Inspiration for "Kramer""
This was first shown three days after the last episode of "Seinfeld"
"New Kid on the Block"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Bring Sheep to Class"
"New Kids on the Blecch"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Buy a Presidential Pardon"
A reference to ex-President Clinton granting Presidential pardons to people who made donations/payments to his election campaign
"Oh Brother, Where Art Thou?"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Sell Land in Florida"
"The Old Man and The "C" Student"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Loose Teeth Don't Need My Help"
"Old Money"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Grease the Monkey Bars"
"Old Yeller-Belly"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"My Pen is Not a Booger Launcher"
"On a Clear Day I Can't See My Sister"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Beer in a Milk Carton is Not Milk"
"The Otto Show"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Spin the Turtle"
"The Parent Rap"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Nobody Reads These Anymore"
"Pokey Mom"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not 'let the Dogs Out'"
"Pray Anything"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"SpongeBob is Not a Contraceptive"
"Principal Charming"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Belch the National Anthem"
"$pringfield"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Say "Springfield" Just to Get Applause"
"The PTA Disbands"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Do Not Have Power of Attorney over First Graders"
"Pygmoelian"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Dodgeball Stops at the Gym Door"
"Radioactive Man"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
""Bewitched" Does Not Promote Satanism"
"Radio Bart"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Carve Gods"
"Realty Bites"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"There Was No Roman God Named 'Fartacus'"
"Regarding Margie"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Leak the Plot of the Movie"
"'Round Springfield"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Nerve Gas is Not a Toy"
"Saddlesore Galactica"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Substitute Teachers Are Not Scabs"
"Saturdays of Thunder"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Fake Rabies"
This never appeared in original airings in the USA, but did in Canada
"Secrets of a Successful Marriage"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Five Days is Not Too Long to Wait for a Gun"
"Selma's Choice"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Yell 'She's Dead' During Roll Call"
"Separate Vocations"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Barf Unless I'm Sick"
"She of Little Faith"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Do Not Have a Cereal Named After Me"
When this episode first aired, he did - Bart Simpson Peanut Butter Chocolate Crunch (along with Homer's Cinnamon Donut Cereal)
"She Used to Be My Girl"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Poking a Dead Raccoon is Not Research"
"Sideshow Bob's Last Gleaming"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Wedgies Are Unhealthy for Children and Other Living Things"
"Simpson and Delilah"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Tar is Not a Plaything"
"Simpsoncalifragilisticexpiala (ANNOYED GRUNT)cious"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Hide the Teacher's Prozac"
"The Simpsons 138th Episode Spectacular"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Only Do This Once a Year"
Which is a reference to it being another "clip" show
"Simpson Safari"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Flush Evidence"
"Simpsons Bible Stories"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Cannot Absolve Sins"
In the Moses story, Bart carves "I Will Not Deface" (actually, "I Well Knot D-Face") in hieroglyphics
"Simpsons Tall Tales"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Should Not Be Twenty-one by Now"
He would be 21 in the 12th season if he was 10 in the first season, which ended in 1990, and he aged normally
"Simpson Tide"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"My Butt Does Not Deserve a Website"
"Skinner's Sense of Snow"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Science Class Should Not End in Tragedy"
During the episode, Principal Skinner writes "I ain't not a dorkus"
"So It's Come to This: A Simpsons Clip Show"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"No One is Interested in My Underpants"
"Some Enchanted Evening"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Yell 'Fire' in a Crowded Classroom"
"The Springfield Connection"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Mock Mrs. Dumbface"
"The Springfield Files"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Truth is Not out There"
A reference to "The X-Files"
"Stark Raving Dad"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not a Dentist"
"Stop or My Dog Will Shoot"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Pearls Are Not Oyster Barf"
"A Streetcar Named Marge"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"My Name is Not Dr. Death"
"The Strong Arms of the Ma"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"This School Does Not Need a 'regime Change'"
"Sunday, Cruddy Sunday"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Do the Dirty Bird"
The "dirty bird" is the "celebration dance" of the Atlanta Falcons, one of the teams in the 1999 Super Bowl
"The Sweetest Apu"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Never Lie About Being Cancelled Again"
A reference to Matt Groening commenting in an interview that the show was "closer to winding it up" (and then claiming he was "misquoted and misunderstood")
"Sweet Seymour Skinner's Baadasssss Song"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Celebrate Meaningless Milestones"
This was first used for the 100th new episode
"Take My Wife, Sleaze"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Can't See Dead People"
A reference to the movie "The Sixth Sense" (coincidentally, Haley Joel Osment, who played the boy in the movie who could see dead people, was at one time the voice of Curly on "Hey Arnold!", which was created by Matt Groening's brother-in-law)
"A Tale of Two Springfields"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Plant SubliminAL MessaGOREs"
A reference to the "subliminal message" claim during the 2000 USA Presidential Election campaign; during a Republican commercial, the word "RAT" appeared briefly while Democrats were being mentioned
"Tales from the Public Domain"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Vampire is Not a Career Choice"
"Team Homer"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not Certified to Remove Asbestos"
"The Tell-Tale Head"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Did Not See Elvis"
"Tennis the Menace"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Publish the Principal's Credit Report"
"There's No Disgrace Like Home"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Burp in Class"
"Thirty Minutes Over Tokyo"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I'm So Very Tired"
"This Little Wiggy"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Was Not Told to Do This"
"Today I Am A Clown"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Over Forty & Single is Not Funny"
"Trash of the Titans"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Mess With the Opening Credits"
This appeared in place of the couch opening; the rest of the family runs into the classroom
"Treehouse of Horror IX"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Simpsons Halloween Special IX"
Written in blood.
"Trilogy of Error"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Fire is Not the Cleanser"
"The Trouble With Trillions"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Demand What I'm Worth"
A reference to the holdout of the cast for more money
"The Twisted World of Marge Simpson"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Am Not Licensed to Do Anything"
"Two Cars in Every Garage and Three Eyes On"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"It's Potato, Not Potatoe"
This was used for the third airing of 7F01 (a reference to Dan Quayle's gaffe while visiting a school)
"Two Cars in Every Garage and Three Eyes On"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Xerox My Butt"
"Two Dozen and One Greyhounds"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"The Good Humor Man Can Only Be Pushed So Far"
"Viva Ned Flanders"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"My Mom is Not Dating Jerry Seinfeld"
"The War of the Simpsons"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Do Anything Bad Ever Again"
"The Way We Was"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Get Very Far With This Attitude"
"We're On the Road to D'ohwhere"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Teacher Was Not Dumped"
It was mutual
"Whacking Day"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Return the Seeing-eye Dog"
"When Flanders Failed"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Nobody Likes Sunburn Slappers"
"When You Dish Upon a Star"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"'butt.butt' is Not My E-mail Address"
Originally, "butt.com" appeared in place of "butt.butt", but it was changed as butt.com is an actual web site address; however, "butt.com" still appeared in Canada
"Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part One)"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"This is Not a Clue...or is It?"
In this episode, there are clues that are supposed to reveal who shoots Mr. Burns
"Who Shot Mr. Burns? (Part Two)"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Complain About the Solution when I Hear It"
In this episode, the shooter (see 2F16) is revealed
"Wild Barts Can't Be Broken"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"Sherri Does Not 'got Back'"
"The Wizard of Evergreen Terrace"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not File Frivolous Lawsuits"
"The Worst Episode Ever"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Hide the Teacher's Medication"
"You Only Move Twice"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Did Not Learn Everything I Need to Know in Kindergarten"
"The Ziff Who Came to Dinner"
   featured the chalkboard gag   
"I Will Not Speculate on How Hot Teacher Used to Be"


Facts contributed by:


jmaxg








   About - Terms - Privacy Log In